Blogging about life with my three mischevious little monkeys!
Wednesday, 29 February 2012
A Year In Photos-Day 60
It was a beautiful afternoon and the toddler asked to have lunch outside, sitting on the doorstep. Hard to believe it's only February!
Tuesday, 28 February 2012
Real Men Don't Hug...
....according to John Prescott and Roger Lewis in this article here.
Looking back, I recall only a few hugs from my father and even less from his parents. As I became older I was the one to instigate hugs with them. My Mum's family on the other side are all big 'huggers'.
I fondly remember huge bear hugs from my late Grandad where I was made to feel safe and nothing else mattered. On one occasion, when my ex had attacked me, I ran to my grandparents house. My Grandad was the only one home and as soon as he put his arms around me I knew it'd be alright. Very little needed to be said. He was abandoned along with his siblings as a young child and although he was lucky enough to find a wonderful foster mother I believe it made him cherish his family even more so.
I asked hubby for his response to the story about real men not hugging their children and this is it...
The article in the Daily Mail the other day about John Prescott not hugging his son, was quite a damning judgement on fathers that do hug their children. It even suggested it only happens to make a visual public point to others. I must confess it got me quite angry!
Until I read that article, I had never once analysed why I hug my children, it just happens spontaneously. Not to make a point to others, not because I feel a duty to do so, and not because it's fashionable or 'the done thing'. The act of hugging just happens, because it's the best, most logical, most appropriate response to the situation I am in at that time.
For example, when I come in from work, after 9 hours away from my children, during the last 5 minutes of my car journey I start to get excited about seeing them. Wondering what they have been up to. Wondering what they are doing...... so, when I open the door and they run towards me shouting Daaaaaaad, and jumping up and down, the most natural response is to open my arms and let them run into me for a big hug. It's not planned, it's not every day, but when it happens, it's real and it's in the moment. I would liken it to a footballer scoring a goal (my wife won't like me saying that), but footballers hug after a goal, to show their joy at what has just happened. When my children run up to me they are showing their joy that I am home from work, and that joyous feeling is one I feel too.
But there are so many other spontaneous situations that occur, when hugging is not planned or on the agenda but it just happens. What about those dreaded wardrobe monsters? You can try all the guns, tanks, and swords that you like to try and slay those monsters and keep them at bay, but no weapon is as effective as a good hug from dad.
And what about those disappointments in life..... getting left off the school footie team, not getting invited to Freddie's party, only getting 8 out of 10 in the spelling test. Those disappointments are small compared to the bigger things that life throws at you from time to time. Isn't it reassuring for anyone to know that throughout those disappointments, if you need someone to turn to, your dad is always there to help with a kind word, a hand around the shoulder, some advice, or yes.... a hug.
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| David Castillo Dominici / FreeDigitalPhotos.net |
I fondly remember huge bear hugs from my late Grandad where I was made to feel safe and nothing else mattered. On one occasion, when my ex had attacked me, I ran to my grandparents house. My Grandad was the only one home and as soon as he put his arms around me I knew it'd be alright. Very little needed to be said. He was abandoned along with his siblings as a young child and although he was lucky enough to find a wonderful foster mother I believe it made him cherish his family even more so.
I asked hubby for his response to the story about real men not hugging their children and this is it...
The article in the Daily Mail the other day about John Prescott not hugging his son, was quite a damning judgement on fathers that do hug their children. It even suggested it only happens to make a visual public point to others. I must confess it got me quite angry!
Until I read that article, I had never once analysed why I hug my children, it just happens spontaneously. Not to make a point to others, not because I feel a duty to do so, and not because it's fashionable or 'the done thing'. The act of hugging just happens, because it's the best, most logical, most appropriate response to the situation I am in at that time.
For example, when I come in from work, after 9 hours away from my children, during the last 5 minutes of my car journey I start to get excited about seeing them. Wondering what they have been up to. Wondering what they are doing...... so, when I open the door and they run towards me shouting Daaaaaaad, and jumping up and down, the most natural response is to open my arms and let them run into me for a big hug. It's not planned, it's not every day, but when it happens, it's real and it's in the moment. I would liken it to a footballer scoring a goal (my wife won't like me saying that), but footballers hug after a goal, to show their joy at what has just happened. When my children run up to me they are showing their joy that I am home from work, and that joyous feeling is one I feel too.
But there are so many other spontaneous situations that occur, when hugging is not planned or on the agenda but it just happens. What about those dreaded wardrobe monsters? You can try all the guns, tanks, and swords that you like to try and slay those monsters and keep them at bay, but no weapon is as effective as a good hug from dad.
And what about those disappointments in life..... getting left off the school footie team, not getting invited to Freddie's party, only getting 8 out of 10 in the spelling test. Those disappointments are small compared to the bigger things that life throws at you from time to time. Isn't it reassuring for anyone to know that throughout those disappointments, if you need someone to turn to, your dad is always there to help with a kind word, a hand around the shoulder, some advice, or yes.... a hug.
A Year In Photos-Day 58 & Day 59
Day 58
Every other Monday my Mum comes over mid-morning and takes the toddler out for lunch so that I have time to get on with the housework in peace and have some me-time. As you can see he wasn't fussed in the slightest to be leaving me!
Day 59
It's been a tough and emotional few days and as usual I head straight for the chocolate. All I could find tonight was the toddler's Freddos. You won't tell him, will you? ;-)
Ten on Tuesday 19
Becky from @mummynotes features this week. Becky answered these questions on the evening of 11th February and woke to the news that one of her chosen dinner guests, Whitney Houston, had died. Understandably, I believe Becky was a little freaked out by this!
1.Who are you and what do you do?
My name is Becky, I'm newly into my 30s and living with my wonderful fiance of over 13 years. I'm a stay-at-home-mum to 19 month old Zachary, before then I was a housewife and before that worked in various customer service roles, mostly in call-centres. A far cry from the career in journalism I had planned out whilst at school. Now the only writing I do is on my blog at mummynotes.com and that's only when I get off my backside and stop procrastinating.
2.What was the last film you watched?
That was quite a while ago (cBeebies rules in this house), but it was some crappy sci-fi b-movie called "Metal Tornado". It was about a weather experiment that went wrong and created a deadly invisible magnetic tornado. Clearly the creators thought long and hard about the title.
I did say it was crap.
3.Do you have a favourite holiday destination?
Wales without a doubt, not that I'm exactly well-travelled. My fiance and I took our first holiday there and I've always wanted to go back. Unfortunately, the beautiful cliff-side hotel we stayed in has since been demolished and some ridiculously expensive apartments erected in its place.
My dream holiday destination would be anywhere with palm trees, blue seas and not a cloud in the sky.
4.Which 4 people, dead or alive, would you invite to dinner?
No one really, I'm a bit anti-social and wouldn't make a good hostess. Clive Owen, if we were talking about a dinner date. ;) Do fictional people count? Because I'd really love to meet Mr Spock. Hmm... Whitney Houston, because I've been a huge fan since I was a teenager and it would be a dream come true to meet her. And despite being agnostic, God would be very welcome. I've lots of questions for him. Now there's an eclectic mix. :D
5.What was the last website you visited?
Facebook, I check it regularly throughout the day. Even though I don't have many friends lol.
6.What’s your guilty pleasure?
Spending money. Which is a real shame as we have absolutely none at the moment. Chocolate will have to suffice for now.
7.What was the last cd you bought?
An actual physical CD? Now that's a tough one! I honestly can't remember, but I can tell you the first one - it was Meatloaf's "I Would Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That)". Starting to show my age here.....
The last mp3 I bought was Alicia Keys "Empire State of Mind". I prefer to buy singles rather than albums, especially as it's easy to do these days with iTunes.
8.Who makes you laugh?
Cliched, but true - my son. He does the daftest things, just like his daddy!
9.What do you like most about where you live?
The peace and quiet! I'm not a city girl, but spent the first 29 years of my life living in a busy town and hated it. When I fell pregnant with my son, I knew I wanted to raise him somewhere with a slower pace of life, so we sold up and re-located to a roomy home in the country.
10.Describe yourself in 5 words.
Impatient, honest, caring, stubborn, perfectionist. Not necessarily in that order.
1.Who are you and what do you do?
My name is Becky, I'm newly into my 30s and living with my wonderful fiance of over 13 years. I'm a stay-at-home-mum to 19 month old Zachary, before then I was a housewife and before that worked in various customer service roles, mostly in call-centres. A far cry from the career in journalism I had planned out whilst at school. Now the only writing I do is on my blog at mummynotes.com and that's only when I get off my backside and stop procrastinating.
2.What was the last film you watched?
That was quite a while ago (cBeebies rules in this house), but it was some crappy sci-fi b-movie called "Metal Tornado". It was about a weather experiment that went wrong and created a deadly invisible magnetic tornado. Clearly the creators thought long and hard about the title.
I did say it was crap.
3.Do you have a favourite holiday destination?
Wales without a doubt, not that I'm exactly well-travelled. My fiance and I took our first holiday there and I've always wanted to go back. Unfortunately, the beautiful cliff-side hotel we stayed in has since been demolished and some ridiculously expensive apartments erected in its place.
My dream holiday destination would be anywhere with palm trees, blue seas and not a cloud in the sky.
4.Which 4 people, dead or alive, would you invite to dinner?
No one really, I'm a bit anti-social and wouldn't make a good hostess. Clive Owen, if we were talking about a dinner date. ;) Do fictional people count? Because I'd really love to meet Mr Spock. Hmm... Whitney Houston, because I've been a huge fan since I was a teenager and it would be a dream come true to meet her. And despite being agnostic, God would be very welcome. I've lots of questions for him. Now there's an eclectic mix. :D
5.What was the last website you visited?
Facebook, I check it regularly throughout the day. Even though I don't have many friends lol.
6.What’s your guilty pleasure?
Spending money. Which is a real shame as we have absolutely none at the moment. Chocolate will have to suffice for now.
7.What was the last cd you bought?
An actual physical CD? Now that's a tough one! I honestly can't remember, but I can tell you the first one - it was Meatloaf's "I Would Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That)". Starting to show my age here.....
The last mp3 I bought was Alicia Keys "Empire State of Mind". I prefer to buy singles rather than albums, especially as it's easy to do these days with iTunes.
8.Who makes you laugh?
Cliched, but true - my son. He does the daftest things, just like his daddy!
9.What do you like most about where you live?
The peace and quiet! I'm not a city girl, but spent the first 29 years of my life living in a busy town and hated it. When I fell pregnant with my son, I knew I wanted to raise him somewhere with a slower pace of life, so we sold up and re-located to a roomy home in the country.
10.Describe yourself in 5 words.
Impatient, honest, caring, stubborn, perfectionist. Not necessarily in that order.
Sunday, 26 February 2012
Soulmates?
Hubby often says that we're on the same wavelength. I deny it though as the thought terrifies me!
While shopping for hubby's anniversary present Middle and I tried out at least 2 dozen aftershaves in various stores with the thought of buying him some for his birthday in March.
I chose Optimistic by Paul Smith
While shopping for hubby's anniversary present Middle and I tried out at least 2 dozen aftershaves in various stores with the thought of buying him some for his birthday in March.
I chose Optimistic by Paul Smith
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| boots.com |
A few days later I opened my birthday presents and received....
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| boots.com |
.....Optimistic by Paul Smith!
Hubby had bought mine long before I went shopping and Middle wouldn't have known. Maybe we are on the same wavelength after all.....
A Year In Photos-Day 57
We headed to the coast today for some fresh air and exercise. The toddler had a fantastic time running free on the beach.
Saturday, 25 February 2012
A Year In Photos-Day 56
The eldest two were playing outside so I thought it an ideal time to try and get a photo for today. It's rare that I can get a smiling photo of Middle as he's uncomfortable with having to smile 'on demand' for photos but I managed to catch him smiling naturally and I think it's lovely.
Friday, 24 February 2012
Yellow Moon Bloggers Network
I first heard of Yellow Moon about 6 years ago when the toddler group I attended with Girl used to raise funds by parents buying from the Yellow Moon catalogue quoting the toddler group's unique code which entitles them to cash-back of up to 20% of sales made using that code. We attend another toddler group locally and the organiser regularly gets the children's craft activities through Yellow Moon so we were, well, over the moon (excuse the pun) to be chosen for the Yellow Moon Bloggers Network.
My eldest two love arts and crafts and although I'm not the most creative of people I love the time it enables us to spend together. Girl and Middle are forever drawing or making things. Middle's latest obsession is with cutting masses of paper and card and then sticking it all together with tons of sticky tape which sounds banal but his creativity is shining through and he surprises me with his ideas.
Our first parcel from Yellow Moon arrived with perfect timing. The children had been off school ill and were ill throughout the half term break so when we had a quiet moment and they felt up to it we got the box of materials out.
We were sent a variety of card and paper, pirate foam stickers, butterfly and flower foam shapes, feathered friends foam magnet sets, flower fairy 3d kits, and a pack of assorted foam sticker shapes.
Girl chose the fridge magnets first as she wanted to make one for me. I collect magnets and our fridge freezer is covered with them. What's one more?!
The Feathered Friends sets are pre-cut and each magnet pack includes instructions. They would make a great little party bag filler. All you need is included, except glue and I would recommend a strong glue. We used an all-purpose quick setting glue.
Girl soon got to work and was able to follow the simple instructions independently. She managed to finish in a matter of minutes and made a second one to send to her Hungarian penpal. She really enjoyed making these and as was impressed that she didn't need my help.
After that she got the Large Butterfly and Flower Foam Shapes to decorate. She found some old High School Musical stickers that were spares from a collector's album so we decided to make a collage. It was as simple as cutting the stickers, placing them on the foam shapes and then adding some glitter. She loves it and can't wait to put it up on her bedroom wall.
I think these would be great used on party invites and thank you notes. Middle wants to use them for his next birthday which he's got a long wait for seeing as it's 10 months away!
Overall we loved this pack. The instructions for the kits were easy to follow and the foam stickers were so easy for the children to use. Although they could do most of the activities alone we still sat together and had quality time together doing something productive. The foam shapes and stickers can be used for anything your child's imagination comes up with and that's how they enjoy their craft sessions most. I can't wait to see what they come up with next!
My eldest two love arts and crafts and although I'm not the most creative of people I love the time it enables us to spend together. Girl and Middle are forever drawing or making things. Middle's latest obsession is with cutting masses of paper and card and then sticking it all together with tons of sticky tape which sounds banal but his creativity is shining through and he surprises me with his ideas.
Our first parcel from Yellow Moon arrived with perfect timing. The children had been off school ill and were ill throughout the half term break so when we had a quiet moment and they felt up to it we got the box of materials out.
We were sent a variety of card and paper, pirate foam stickers, butterfly and flower foam shapes, feathered friends foam magnet sets, flower fairy 3d kits, and a pack of assorted foam sticker shapes.
Girl chose the fridge magnets first as she wanted to make one for me. I collect magnets and our fridge freezer is covered with them. What's one more?!
Girl soon got to work and was able to follow the simple instructions independently. She managed to finish in a matter of minutes and made a second one to send to her Hungarian penpal. She really enjoyed making these and as was impressed that she didn't need my help.
After that she got the Large Butterfly and Flower Foam Shapes to decorate. She found some old High School Musical stickers that were spares from a collector's album so we decided to make a collage. It was as simple as cutting the stickers, placing them on the foam shapes and then adding some glitter. She loves it and can't wait to put it up on her bedroom wall.
We then moved onto the Flower Fairy kits. Again, these kits are all pre-cut and come with everything you need except glue. The instructions were easy to follow but Girl struggled a little and it was a tad fiddly so she needed quite a bit of help. Quick drying glue is a must with these! They still look nice and she is proudly displaying her fairy on her shelf. They are recommended for age 5+ and they would be another good party bag filler but probably for an older girl or one that would definitely have some adult assistance.
I thought she'd be tired after all that but she'd been itching to use the glitter card that we'd been sent. She chose the black card and using some paper drew some planets and then added a foam rocket and foam stars using a selection of the foam shapes we had. Sadly the photo doesn't do it justice but it looks great. I only wish we'd had these when Middle was studying Space last term. You can't go wrong with these self-adhesive stickers. The possibilities are endless and they are so easy to use.
Middle couldn't wait to use the Pirate Foam Stickers. There are flags, skulls, treasure maps, treasure chests, pirate ships, parrots and more.....
We had a birthday present to wrap and we'd run out of paper so we used brown parcel paper and Middle stuck a selection of pirate stickers all over to decorate it and it looked quite effective. He wouldn't let me take a photo for some reason but I'm sure you get the idea! We also made a gift tag with a piece of card, a single foam sticker and some old string that we had.
He also decided to make a pirate-themed card for his cousin and used some foam letters that we had in our own craft box (although these are available on the Yellow Moon website)
Overall we loved this pack. The instructions for the kits were easy to follow and the foam stickers were so easy for the children to use. Although they could do most of the activities alone we still sat together and had quality time together doing something productive. The foam shapes and stickers can be used for anything your child's imagination comes up with and that's how they enjoy their craft sessions most. I can't wait to see what they come up with next!
Thursday, 23 February 2012
A Year In Photos-Day 54
It's a beautiful day out there. The sun is shining and it's very warm. We appear to be experiencing a mini heatwave!
As I was walking around the garden having a little tidy up I spotted this ladybird. It reminded me of last summer when the children went on a ladybird hunt. It kept them busy and happy for hours. The simple things in life....
As I was walking around the garden having a little tidy up I spotted this ladybird. It reminded me of last summer when the children went on a ladybird hunt. It kept them busy and happy for hours. The simple things in life....
Wednesday, 22 February 2012
A Year In Photos-Day 53
After a few days stuck indoors I finally have freedom! The school run was tiring this morning but it felt so good to be outside. You'd think I'd been indoors for weeks but it just felt that way.
As I hung the washing outside I noticed some snowdrops in the garden. Spring is on it's way. It's my favourite time of year. New beginnings, sunshine and flowers after a dull, cold winter.....I love it!
As I hung the washing outside I noticed some snowdrops in the garden. Spring is on it's way. It's my favourite time of year. New beginnings, sunshine and flowers after a dull, cold winter.....I love it!
Tuesday, 21 February 2012
A Year In Photos-Day 52
Forget the likes of Iggle Piggle, Mr Tumble and Peppa Pig. Tidgy's favourite tv show is Mr Bean! He goes crazy whenever it's on and even gets the children's Mr Bean dvds out of the cupboard and tries to put them into the dvd player.
Monday, 20 February 2012
Ten on Tuesday No18
This week features Guy Brinkley, husband of Shelley from Ten on Tuesday No15
1. Who are you and what do you do?
My name is Guy Brinkley, 30 years old, I am a married, father of 2, hopefully 3 by the time this goes to print. Due 13th Feb. I am a manager of a betting shop, employed by one of the big name high street chains.
2.Did you have any resolutions for 2012?
I didn't really have any resolutions for 2012, although I was getting rather dismayed by the growth around my midrift so have purchased a bicycle and now ride to and from work daily.
3. Do you prefer to watch sport or take part?
I prefer to take part in sport, the sense of well being afterwards is second to none for me, although watching sport is a very large part of my life, at work and at home.
4. What was the last website you visited?
At the Races, I was checking my horse results from today.
5.Which 4 people, dead or alive, would you invite to dinner?
My Grandad, he was my best pal as a young lad, now I'm an adult I bet he could tell me all the stories that my mum used to tell him he wasn't allowed to tell me! Sir Bobby Robson, I have met Sir Bobby once and he seemed like he would have one or two memories to enjoy. Karl Pilkington, the bloke actually enforces tears to leave my face, he is so funny. Katie Melua, to sit and play the music all night, she has a beautiful voice, I could sit and listen to her all day.
6.If you won £1million what would you do?
£1 million. Well Shelley would love an Aston Martin, Then we would purchase a house, Then a couple of Racehorses.
7. Who is your favourite comedian?
Karl Pilkington, although not sure if he qualifies, so maybe Ricky Gervais as Karl is a Ricky "creation" as such.
8.Describe yourself in 5 words
Confident, Charming, Approachable, Intelligent, Dad.
9. What was the last thing you bought yourself?
A new PS3 controller, 4 solid years of FIFA took their toll on the last one!
10. What was the last film you watched?
X-Men First class, although I fell asleep half way through that one, before that was the Inbetweeners movie.
Thanks for taking part Guy and congratulations to you & Shelley on the birth of your gorgeous new daughter.
1. Who are you and what do you do?
My name is Guy Brinkley, 30 years old, I am a married, father of 2, hopefully 3 by the time this goes to print. Due 13th Feb. I am a manager of a betting shop, employed by one of the big name high street chains.
2.Did you have any resolutions for 2012?
I didn't really have any resolutions for 2012, although I was getting rather dismayed by the growth around my midrift so have purchased a bicycle and now ride to and from work daily.
3. Do you prefer to watch sport or take part?
I prefer to take part in sport, the sense of well being afterwards is second to none for me, although watching sport is a very large part of my life, at work and at home.
4. What was the last website you visited?
At the Races, I was checking my horse results from today.
5.Which 4 people, dead or alive, would you invite to dinner?
My Grandad, he was my best pal as a young lad, now I'm an adult I bet he could tell me all the stories that my mum used to tell him he wasn't allowed to tell me! Sir Bobby Robson, I have met Sir Bobby once and he seemed like he would have one or two memories to enjoy. Karl Pilkington, the bloke actually enforces tears to leave my face, he is so funny. Katie Melua, to sit and play the music all night, she has a beautiful voice, I could sit and listen to her all day.
6.If you won £1million what would you do?
£1 million. Well Shelley would love an Aston Martin, Then we would purchase a house, Then a couple of Racehorses.
7. Who is your favourite comedian?
Karl Pilkington, although not sure if he qualifies, so maybe Ricky Gervais as Karl is a Ricky "creation" as such.
8.Describe yourself in 5 words
Confident, Charming, Approachable, Intelligent, Dad.
9. What was the last thing you bought yourself?
A new PS3 controller, 4 solid years of FIFA took their toll on the last one!
10. What was the last film you watched?
X-Men First class, although I fell asleep half way through that one, before that was the Inbetweeners movie.
Thanks for taking part Guy and congratulations to you & Shelley on the birth of your gorgeous new daughter.
Sunday, 19 February 2012
A Year In Photos-Day 50
I'm feeling a bit brighter so while hubby & the children lounge around I have been pottering. The children took part in a cookery class on Saturday at Barleylands where they made cheese scones. I promised to make some for them so I thought I'd have a go today while I was killing time before lunch. I'm fairly impressed considering it was my first attempt. Now they want a constant supply for their packed lunches!
A Year In Photos-Day 49
Another day was spent at home due to illness and in desperation, last thing at night, I needed a photo so I took one of my sleeping baby..
I'm hoping we can get out and about soon so I can take some more interesting photos!
Saturday, 18 February 2012
A Year In Photos-Day 48
Hubby had the day off work so as we were all feeling relatively healthy, compared to previous days, we decided to head to Barleylands in Billericay. We head there about once a year and it's a great place for all the family. Children's farm and activities with a shopping/craft village for the parent's.
We let Tidgy wander around the farm and gave him a lot more freedom than he is used to but we had trouble getting him away from Sandy the rabbit. I think he wanted to take him home!
We let Tidgy wander around the farm and gave him a lot more freedom than he is used to but we had trouble getting him away from Sandy the rabbit. I think he wanted to take him home!
Thursday, 16 February 2012
A Year In Photos-Day 47
I was trying to prepare dinner and talk to hubby about his day but the eldest two were being hyper in the living room and quite frankly doing my head in! I wrapped them up and told them to go outside and burn off some energy.
Girl decided to practise her skipping (while Middle was up to no good in the background!)
Girl decided to practise her skipping (while Middle was up to no good in the background!)
Farewell Whitney....
On Sunday morning the first thing I did when I woke, as always, was to check twitter. I scrolled through a few tweets and noticed the name 'Whitney' appear a few times. She had died. Surely not? I then searched for a news website in the hope it was yet another twitter death hoax but it was sadly not to be.
Another part of my childhood gone. I couldn't believe it. Nothing was confirmed about the cause of death, just that she'd been found in the bath in her hotel room hours before a pre-Grammy's party. It was very sad news.
I have very fond memories of receiving 'Whitney' on cassette as a gift when I was in hospital as a young child. I'm surprised I didn't wear the tape out as it was played constantly on my Walkman. You know, the big clunky machine with bright orange foam headphones where you couldn't just skip a track you had to forward wind it and hope you stopped in the right place?? Those were the days.....!
Anyway, I digress.....As the day went on I became angry at tweets and facebook statuses relating to Whitney. Many were saying that we shouldn't mourn her because she 'was a druggie', 'it was her own fault', 'she could have stopped', 'we shouldn't feel sorry for her as it was inevitable' and so on.
Yes, she was an addict but that's as much as I and many others know. Maybe it was inevitable but that doesn't make it any less sad.
Why did these strangers feel qualified to comment on something they knew nothing about? It hadn't been confirmed as a drug related death yet these people felt that we should have no compassion because it was known she took drugs. So what? Clearly these people have never known an addict in their lives and I hope they never have to.
I certainly don't expect a worldwide outpouring of grief but is it too much to ask to have a little compassion for those left behind, especially her 18 year old daughter who is now without her mother?
RIP Whitney
Another part of my childhood gone. I couldn't believe it. Nothing was confirmed about the cause of death, just that she'd been found in the bath in her hotel room hours before a pre-Grammy's party. It was very sad news.
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| amazon |
Anyway, I digress.....As the day went on I became angry at tweets and facebook statuses relating to Whitney. Many were saying that we shouldn't mourn her because she 'was a druggie', 'it was her own fault', 'she could have stopped', 'we shouldn't feel sorry for her as it was inevitable' and so on.
Yes, she was an addict but that's as much as I and many others know. Maybe it was inevitable but that doesn't make it any less sad.
Why did these strangers feel qualified to comment on something they knew nothing about? It hadn't been confirmed as a drug related death yet these people felt that we should have no compassion because it was known she took drugs. So what? Clearly these people have never known an addict in their lives and I hope they never have to.
I certainly don't expect a worldwide outpouring of grief but is it too much to ask to have a little compassion for those left behind, especially her 18 year old daughter who is now without her mother?
RIP Whitney
Wednesday, 15 February 2012
Life as a SAHM
Sitting here after another day of playing nursemaid I started pondering life as a stay at home mum. I'm a terrible mum when I've had a week or two of one or all of the children being ill. I get cabin fever and I cry out for some me-time. I hate it. I hate the cancelling of lots of plans. I become incredibly selfish. I do hate my children being ill, of course, but I'm an awful carer. I start to wonder whether my children would even care if I wasn't at home all the time.
Last year I wrote the post below for Mums That Work. Nothing much has changed in 12 months except that I'm no longer a Netmums Chairmum and I am actively hunting for work, preferably flexible and based at home so that I can still be with the children, but it's now more of a necessity than a 'want'. It did remind me of the positives of being a SAHM though (and made me feel guilty for whining!)
My views of Stay At Home Mums and being a SAHM have changed a lot over the years and my attitude towards being one changes, albeit temporarily, when I’m having a bad day!
Before our first child was born I just assumed I would go back to work. I never questioned being a stay at home mum. I thought there would be a need for me to work part time and our daughter would go to nursery. As the pregnancy progressed we moved to another town and it would have been difficult for me to travel to my job and I came round to the idea of being at home for my child. My husband was keen for me to stay at home and raise our children and as soon as our daughter was born I knew I had made the right decision. It’s a luxury to be in that position as I am aware of many that have to work and do not have the choice of staying at home.
Over the last 7 years I have found that there are many positives to being at home but there are also some negatives. A regular argument in our household is over who does the most work on an average day. I feel I have the rough end of the deal sometimes and hubby feels that he is the one suffering as he has to go to work. This argument is not helped when I hear about all the practical jokes he has been able to play that day or all the inane conversations he’s had with his team. I have maybe had a few days where I haven’t spoken to anyone other than the children or a few parents in passing at the school gates and it grates on me that he has been able to have fun. I do realise that I am being terribly selfish when I think that.
The positives are plenty though;
I get to enjoy the children growing up. I don’t miss the first smile, first steps, first words. Children grow up far too quickly as it is and having 3 children means that my time is even more precious with each one of them.
I get to attend all plays, sharing assemblies and sports days without having to swap shifts or take time off work. My daughter is most upset that I can’t get someone to have the boys so that I can have Mother’s Day lunch with her at school but I soon pointed out to her that there are some of her friends whose parents are rarely at school so she’s very lucky.
If the children are sick I can be at home for them. I don’t have to take time off work. At most I have to cancel playdates or toddler group. (Not feeling like so much of a positive at the moment!!)
It was hard at first but once you take the first steps to getting out there and going to toddler groups and baby groups you soon get to meet like-minded Mums with children of a similar age. I have also met a lovely bunch of ladies through running my Netmums meet ups. I plan get-togethers for my sake as much as theirs as I know it can be a little isolating being at home with your baby.
Although I do have the school/preschool runs to do I pretty much have free reign of my day. If I feel like going to the park for a couple of hours I can. If I want to go swimming I can.
When I was pregnant with my youngest I was at the doctor’s surgery every other week and hospital in between and my children have had various appointments lately. It’s so much easier to deal with medical appointments when you’re not working.
Taking the children to school and picking them up every day keeps me informed of what’s happening inbetween parent’s evenings.
I’m quite poor at time management and it’s only through recent illness that I have learnt to take breaks from the housework and menial tasks to sit down and spend some quality time with the children. They won’t always be young. A tidy, clean house doesn’t necessarily make for happy content children.
Often when I’ve had a tough day with one, or all, of the children I see so many negatives. I feel guilty when I’ve not been able to do anything because my youngest has needed my constant attention and then when hubby sits on the sofa after the children have gone to bed and I’m still ‘working’ I feel really resentful.
Weekends and holidays can be no different from the usual Monday to Friday for me at times. My youngest is going through a terrible phase of separation anxiety and screams for me constantly when I’m not in the room with him. A friend of mine actually looks forward to work as it’s HER time to be herself and not Mummy. She really enjoys her two days a week at work away from her children and I can see where she is coming from.
I often think about getting a part time job but the way things are at the moment with my husband’s work and school governor meetings I cannot commit myself to anything. We spent the last few months panicking about my husband being made redundant and unless he could have found a like for like job I would have needed to go back to work. On one hand I looked forward to getting away for a few hours a week. On the other hand I was terrified of going back to work for the first time in 7 years! I really don’t envy him working now though. The re-structure and merger at his company has left him feeling desperately unhappy. So much so that he wishes he’d been made redundant.
It can be very stressful being a full time Mum. It is a full time job in itself. Unpaid, often unrecognised but extremely rewarding. I wouldn’t give it up for anything. I am very lucky having the choice of being around for my children every day.
Last year I wrote the post below for Mums That Work. Nothing much has changed in 12 months except that I'm no longer a Netmums Chairmum and I am actively hunting for work, preferably flexible and based at home so that I can still be with the children, but it's now more of a necessity than a 'want'. It did remind me of the positives of being a SAHM though (and made me feel guilty for whining!)
My views of Stay At Home Mums and being a SAHM have changed a lot over the years and my attitude towards being one changes, albeit temporarily, when I’m having a bad day!
Before our first child was born I just assumed I would go back to work. I never questioned being a stay at home mum. I thought there would be a need for me to work part time and our daughter would go to nursery. As the pregnancy progressed we moved to another town and it would have been difficult for me to travel to my job and I came round to the idea of being at home for my child. My husband was keen for me to stay at home and raise our children and as soon as our daughter was born I knew I had made the right decision. It’s a luxury to be in that position as I am aware of many that have to work and do not have the choice of staying at home.
Over the last 7 years I have found that there are many positives to being at home but there are also some negatives. A regular argument in our household is over who does the most work on an average day. I feel I have the rough end of the deal sometimes and hubby feels that he is the one suffering as he has to go to work. This argument is not helped when I hear about all the practical jokes he has been able to play that day or all the inane conversations he’s had with his team. I have maybe had a few days where I haven’t spoken to anyone other than the children or a few parents in passing at the school gates and it grates on me that he has been able to have fun. I do realise that I am being terribly selfish when I think that.
The positives are plenty though;
I get to enjoy the children growing up. I don’t miss the first smile, first steps, first words. Children grow up far too quickly as it is and having 3 children means that my time is even more precious with each one of them.
I get to attend all plays, sharing assemblies and sports days without having to swap shifts or take time off work. My daughter is most upset that I can’t get someone to have the boys so that I can have Mother’s Day lunch with her at school but I soon pointed out to her that there are some of her friends whose parents are rarely at school so she’s very lucky.
If the children are sick I can be at home for them. I don’t have to take time off work. At most I have to cancel playdates or toddler group. (Not feeling like so much of a positive at the moment!!)
It was hard at first but once you take the first steps to getting out there and going to toddler groups and baby groups you soon get to meet like-minded Mums with children of a similar age. I have also met a lovely bunch of ladies through running my Netmums meet ups. I plan get-togethers for my sake as much as theirs as I know it can be a little isolating being at home with your baby.
Although I do have the school/preschool runs to do I pretty much have free reign of my day. If I feel like going to the park for a couple of hours I can. If I want to go swimming I can.
When I was pregnant with my youngest I was at the doctor’s surgery every other week and hospital in between and my children have had various appointments lately. It’s so much easier to deal with medical appointments when you’re not working.
Taking the children to school and picking them up every day keeps me informed of what’s happening inbetween parent’s evenings.
I’m quite poor at time management and it’s only through recent illness that I have learnt to take breaks from the housework and menial tasks to sit down and spend some quality time with the children. They won’t always be young. A tidy, clean house doesn’t necessarily make for happy content children.
Often when I’ve had a tough day with one, or all, of the children I see so many negatives. I feel guilty when I’ve not been able to do anything because my youngest has needed my constant attention and then when hubby sits on the sofa after the children have gone to bed and I’m still ‘working’ I feel really resentful.
Weekends and holidays can be no different from the usual Monday to Friday for me at times. My youngest is going through a terrible phase of separation anxiety and screams for me constantly when I’m not in the room with him. A friend of mine actually looks forward to work as it’s HER time to be herself and not Mummy. She really enjoys her two days a week at work away from her children and I can see where she is coming from.
I often think about getting a part time job but the way things are at the moment with my husband’s work and school governor meetings I cannot commit myself to anything. We spent the last few months panicking about my husband being made redundant and unless he could have found a like for like job I would have needed to go back to work. On one hand I looked forward to getting away for a few hours a week. On the other hand I was terrified of going back to work for the first time in 7 years! I really don’t envy him working now though. The re-structure and merger at his company has left him feeling desperately unhappy. So much so that he wishes he’d been made redundant.
It can be very stressful being a full time Mum. It is a full time job in itself. Unpaid, often unrecognised but extremely rewarding. I wouldn’t give it up for anything. I am very lucky having the choice of being around for my children every day.
A Year In Photos-Day 46
Just as I thought we were done with bugs and viruses Girl has spent most of the day being violently sick. I'm hoping it's just a 24 hour thing as that's what Middle had over the weekend.
I've decided we need to shut ourselves away from everyone so that we can all recover and get rid of those nasty germs that have so far caused over 2 weeks of illness.
I've decided we need to shut ourselves away from everyone so that we can all recover and get rid of those nasty germs that have so far caused over 2 weeks of illness.
A Year In Photos-Day 45
This, slightly controversial, sculpture on Ipswich Waterfront is a favourite of Girl & Middle's so when we passed it on our way to meet with friends they wanted a photo of them standing with it. Girl calls it 'The Fallen Down Question Mark' and Middle thinks there must have been a really loud bang when it fell down!
Tuesday, 14 February 2012
Ten On Tuesday No17
This week features tweeter and blogger @ChelseaMamma
1.Who are you and what do you do?
My name is Kara and I am a mum of 5. I have recently left work in an American Investment Bank and am now setting up as a childminder.
2.What do you like to do in your spare time?
What is spare time? Lol. We like to take the family on nice walks to the beach or countryside!
3.Do you have any guilty pleasures?
I love to listen to James Blunt and drink wine (not necessarily at the same time)
4.Describe yourself in 5 words
mum, wife, daughter, lover and friend
5.If you won £1million what would you do?
I'd buy a bigger house so the children had there own bedroom and a seperate playroom. I'd also buy myself a car and treat the family to a Disney holiday and then put a chunk away for a rainy day!
6.What was the last film you watched?
Inbetweeners (and I hated it)
7.What was the first concert you went to?
Boyzone
8.Where in the world would you like to visit?
Dubai, New Zealand and Norway (to see the Northern lights)
9.What was the last website you visited?
Busy Bee Candles
10.If you had to recommend a book to a friend which would you choose?
I adore the Harry potter books!!
Thanks so much for answering these Kara. I wanted to hate The Inbetweeners movie but I did chuckle a few times. I haven't read any of the Harry Potter books but I hope to find the time one day. I'm not averse to a little James Blunt. There are worse things to listen to ;)
Monday, 13 February 2012
A Year In Photos-Day 44
We've had a quiet, uninteresting day today so I was struggling for something to photograph. Tonight we painted the second coat of Middle's castle and the children liked the pattern the paint made as I mixed it so here it is....
Sunday, 12 February 2012
Saturday, 11 February 2012
A Year In Photos-Days 41 & 42
Day 41
The children had an inset day yesterday so we took a trip to Norwich Castle. They were being noisy so I locked them up....
Day 42
Middle had just gotten over his nasty cough and cold but woke us last night as he'd been sick in the bed. Then he was sick on himself and our bed and the floor and so on! I'm just hoping it's not the norovirus that had a local school shut last week with half their pupils off. I also spent most of the night awake due to coughing fits so I was exhausted today. We snuggled up on the sofa this afternoon to rest. Let's hope we don't see a repeat of last year when he spent all February half term on the sofa.
Thursday, 9 February 2012
A Year In Photos-Day 40
I've had some wonderful birthday and anniversary presents this morning. I feel very lucky. I'm also being taken out for lunch and dinner :-)
Wednesday, 8 February 2012
A Year In Photos-Day 39
We're spending another day indoors and I was beginning to wonder how on earth I would find a photo for today then as I was washing up I noticed Tidgy having a drink....with a rather unusual drink holder!
Tuesday, 7 February 2012
Calling all you Gok Wan wannabes
I have a wedding to go to in May and I need your help.
I do not know what to wear or even where to begin.
I live in my jeans and baggy tops most of the time and I don't do posh, certainly not on a tight budget!
So...I'd like to set you budding fashionistas a little (well, HUGE where I'm concerned) challenge. I need your suggestions.
Just to give you some help:
I'm a short, lumpy, dumpy, frump. I am 5ft 3ins and I dress suitable for someone 20 years older than I am.
I'm less apple, more yorkshire pudding.
I have the legs and ankles of an elephant so skirts & dresses are out.
I have bingo wings so need sleeves of some kind.
I have hip dysplasia so shoes need to be relatively comfortable to be worn all day & evening. Nothing too high and definitely not open-toed.
My favourite colour is black but apparently black is a big no-no for a daytime wedding. Darn it!
Jeez, what an attractive person ;)
Off you go. Wave your magic wand and show me the perfect outfit......
I do not know what to wear or even where to begin.
I live in my jeans and baggy tops most of the time and I don't do posh, certainly not on a tight budget!
So...I'd like to set you budding fashionistas a little (well, HUGE where I'm concerned) challenge. I need your suggestions.
Just to give you some help:
I'm a short, lumpy, dumpy, frump. I am 5ft 3ins and I dress suitable for someone 20 years older than I am.
I'm less apple, more yorkshire pudding.
I have the legs and ankles of an elephant so skirts & dresses are out.
I have bingo wings so need sleeves of some kind.
I have hip dysplasia so shoes need to be relatively comfortable to be worn all day & evening. Nothing too high and definitely not open-toed.
My favourite colour is black but apparently black is a big no-no for a daytime wedding. Darn it!
Jeez, what an attractive person ;)
Post links to outfits in the comments below please. If you have any questions, please ask. There is no prize for this, just my eternal gratitude.
Off you go. Wave your magic wand and show me the perfect outfit......
A Year In Photos-Day 38
We headed into Woodbridge as is usual for a Tuesday morning but instead of killing time before Pyjama Drama by traipsing around in the snow and browsing in the shops (which Tidgy detests...and costs me money!) I decided to head to the library instead.
Tidgy had a great time choosing a large selection of books and we had a lovely time sitting together on the rug reading and looking at mostly That's Not My.... books.
Where else can you go to keep warm and dry for free?!
I <3 the library :)
Ten on Tuesday No 16
This week Lucinda volunteered to take part. You can follow Lucinda on twitter
1.Who are you and what do you do?
Hello, my names Lucinda and I’m a stay at home mum to two gorgeous boys who I write about on my blog. I also design and create cakes for special occasions.
2.What are your plans for 2012?
We’re hoping to move this year so that and getting organised for once would be good!
3.What’s the first film you saw at the cinema?
Bambi! Can remember getting so upset I didn’t go for another 10 years!
4.What was the last thing you bought for yourself?
A new winter coat. Its gorgeous bright red and incredibly cheerful.
5.Which 4 people , dead or alive, would you invite for dinner?
Hmm I’m a big book and history person so if we’re excluding things like family I would love Winston Churchill, Daphne Du Maurier, Arthur Ransome and probably Nelson Mandela.
6.What is your favourite meal?
My mums lasagne followed by cream tea. Gutty I know but just amazing.
7.What was the last song you listened to?
I wanted a very grown up bit of classical for this but it goes to Kings of Leon – Back Down South. its my ringtone but does mean I tend to forget to answer calls. It just seems to take me to late hot summer evenings.
8.Do you have an embarrassing moment you’d like to share with us?
Ummm we’ll say no for now. Maybe if you catch me unaware one day.
9.What do you like most about where you live?
Well this house was where we came as newly weds and also where both my children came home to as baby’s so it would be all the memory’s I have here.
10.If you had a bucket list what would be the top 3 things on your list?
Travel but 4 or 5 star – I’m not to good slummy it abroad. Own a book shop. Own a small holding (though maybe not at the same time as the book shop!)
Thanks Lucinda. I loved reading your answers and it's now my mission to get you to divulge the answer to number 8 ;)
1.Who are you and what do you do?
Hello, my names Lucinda and I’m a stay at home mum to two gorgeous boys who I write about on my blog. I also design and create cakes for special occasions.
2.What are your plans for 2012?
We’re hoping to move this year so that and getting organised for once would be good!
3.What’s the first film you saw at the cinema?
Bambi! Can remember getting so upset I didn’t go for another 10 years!
4.What was the last thing you bought for yourself?
A new winter coat. Its gorgeous bright red and incredibly cheerful.
5.Which 4 people , dead or alive, would you invite for dinner?
Hmm I’m a big book and history person so if we’re excluding things like family I would love Winston Churchill, Daphne Du Maurier, Arthur Ransome and probably Nelson Mandela.
6.What is your favourite meal?
My mums lasagne followed by cream tea. Gutty I know but just amazing.
7.What was the last song you listened to?
I wanted a very grown up bit of classical for this but it goes to Kings of Leon – Back Down South. its my ringtone but does mean I tend to forget to answer calls. It just seems to take me to late hot summer evenings.
8.Do you have an embarrassing moment you’d like to share with us?
Ummm we’ll say no for now. Maybe if you catch me unaware one day.
9.What do you like most about where you live?
Well this house was where we came as newly weds and also where both my children came home to as baby’s so it would be all the memory’s I have here.
10.If you had a bucket list what would be the top 3 things on your list?
Travel but 4 or 5 star – I’m not to good slummy it abroad. Own a book shop. Own a small holding (though maybe not at the same time as the book shop!)
Thanks Lucinda. I loved reading your answers and it's now my mission to get you to divulge the answer to number 8 ;)
Monday, 6 February 2012
Copyright and Blogging
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| Image: jscreationzs / FreeDigitalPhotos.net |
There have been a few comments on twitter lately about blog posts being copied/reproduced, in part and in full, without permission.
I don't know a great deal about the ins and outs of copyright law but I do have a disclaimer on my blog asking that content isn't reproduced without permission and I, maybe naively, expect people to abide by that. Unfortunately there are unscrupulous people out there who think nothing of plagiarising a post and passing it off as their own and it's often difficult to resolve or even be aware of.
One of the recent problems was with a website reproducing part of a blog post and the blog's header for their own blog. When it was discovered, the owner of the original post then asked for the post to be taken down. A battle then followed as those that had taken the content didn't believe that they were wrong.
They were highlighting a rather sensitive subject written by the blog owner and although I think it's great they want to spread the word I do believe the whole matter could have been handled so much better.
I would see it as an honour that someone wants to highlight a post of mine but I would not be happy if they did so without my permission. Forget copyright laws, it's common sense and simply courteous to ask and you certainly don't reproduce graphics from someone's website without permission.
Had the website owners sought permission I am sure that most bloggers would have been more than happy to go ahead. After all, don't we blog for our posts to be read? Going ahead without checking first and then denying any wrongdoing has just made them look unprofessional and quite frankly I now eye them with suspicion.
A Year In Photos-Day 37
I was a tad cruel this morning. I told the children that they could take the sledge to school but I wasn't going to pull them up the hill, so they used it for their bags instead!
A Year In photos-Day 36
I don't really need to say much about this photo. You can tell by the glint in his eye what he is about to do. Thankfully he missed!
Saturday, 4 February 2012
A Year In Photos-Day 35
Today Middle volunteered to help me shop for hubby's anniversary present. I was a little dubious about taking him as he hates shopping and gets bored but he was a little star, even offering to carry the shopping bags!
We had a lovely lunch together and it's the first time we have had any decent quality time alone since before the toddler was born nearly 2 years ago. It was a wonderful few hours.
We had a lovely lunch together and it's the first time we have had any decent quality time alone since before the toddler was born nearly 2 years ago. It was a wonderful few hours.
Friday, 3 February 2012
A Year In Photos-Day 34
We were interviewed by the lovely Luke Deal for Mark Murphy's radio show this morning and the toddler took a shine to Luke's microphone. I foresee a career at BBC Radio Suffolk for him!
Thursday, 2 February 2012
What are you reading? February
I'm well ahead with my book club reading so I want to begin working my way through the huge pile of books I have waiting patiently to be read.
I've started When God Was A Rabbit
and after that I want to start working my way through my Adrian Mole books again
Click on the button below to see what others are reading this month.
I've started When God Was A Rabbit
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| bbc.co.uk |
While sorting out a cupboard this week I came across the weighty 'coffee table' book below that has been hid away ever since we moved here 6 & a half years ago so I'd like to take me time to take a look at the gorgeous, awe-inspiring photographs.
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| amazon |
Cybher Meet and Greet
The Cybher Meet and Greet
Its become something of a tradition to host a conference 'Meet and greet'
and so here you have it...
a way to make some new friends ahead of the big day!
So this is me with my youngest at Harvest at Jimmy's...
It's unusual to see me without my glasses as I'm blind as a bat without them
but I was showing off my face paint.
This was the best photo I could find as there are very few of me...for a reason!
Name : Heidi
Blogs : Just this one: Him, Me & Three
Twitter ID : @Him_Me_Three and another secret one which I am
not going to tell you about!
Height : 5ft 3, technically known as short-arse. I'm also known as lard-arse ;)
Hair : Brunette with more than a hint of grey
Five things you should know about me...
1. I love blogging and writing in general.
2. I am a twitter addict. Seriously. It's the first thing and last thing
I check every single day.
3. I cannot wait to have a weekend away on my own but during Cybher
I'll be pining for my children every minute.
4. I am equally excited and nervous about Cybher and will end up sitting
in a corner on my own as I don't know anyone else (IRL) that's going.
5. I have crap taste in music. I'm much happier listening
to 60s pop than current chart music.
So that's it.
If you would like to join in the Cybher Meet and Greet, do a post and add it
to the linky on geekisnewchic.
See you in May!
A Year In Photos-Day 33
This has been my day...in fact it's been most of the last fortnight on and off. I considered photographing the sick bowl and piles of sick-covered washing I have, but then though that a bit too much! I think you get the idea.....
Wednesday, 1 February 2012
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